Can I ask my black friends or not?

By Joshua Boyd

There has been a lot of conflicting views on this, and I'd like to give my take.

The answer depends on one major thing in my book: Are they an acquaintance or an actual friend?

If you're contacting someone because they are the one of the few black people you know, you probably shouldn't.

If you know the person well and have a history with them, ask first if they are comfortable talking with you and then proceed under their guidance. If you don't really know them, haven't talked to them in a long time, or are just social media friends, don't go to them unless they said they are open to it previously. There are plenty of available resources and voices on the interwebs you can listen to and learn from.

If you’re still not sure what to do with the questions you have, as a friend of mine said in my Facebook comments, "Just Google it first.”

To be clear though, by no means am I saying you shouldn't voice your support! It has meant a lot to receive messages from those I haven't talked to in years that just wanted to say they see me/us and are standing alongside us in this fight against racism, brutality, and injustice.

If you're reading this, regardless of how well we know each other, feel free to reach out with questions. Just know and understand I may put off getting back to you until I have the time and energy for it.